And Aubrey Was Her Name...

Like a lovely melody that everyone can sing; take away the words that rhyme, it doesn't mean a thing.

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Abashed Return

I write this post somewhat hesitantly, partially because my brain during the last six months or so has served almost entirely to crank out broken English phrases to communicate with five-year-olds, but also because, after such a prodigal's absence, I am attempting a return to the blogging world like an ashamed, contrite child guiltily shuffling her feet and looking down at the floor.

But I'm optimistic about life breathing a sigh and allowing me time not usurped by work and its over analyzation of English. With that, I'd like to write again. I miss it. Though I'm finding my mental tongue has somewhat frozen with the inability to order my thoughts.

There are so many things I miss these days. For some reason, even given my general lack of free time, working for 10 to 12 hours every day, then collapsing into bed most nights, those moments of silence and stillness still cause me to become nostalgic. A journey to the past is about all I can afford with this job. (Well, apart from my recent, albeit brief, jog to freedom in Thailand for Christmas and New Year's.) I think of home and family. I think of friends scattered across the world, like some strange trail left by a hopeful Hansel and Gretel. I think of all the places I'd rather be.

I'm no longer satisfied in Korea, which is actually a kindly euphemistic understatement. I can't yet begin to count down weeks or months or days, so I'm setting markers across this next year for myself, telling myself that if I can make it that far, I can make it a little further. My next date of expectation is the return of two very dear friends who will be working with me (though not with my same duties). "It will get better after that," I tell myself. It has to.

Well, I've officially exhausted myself with the effort of patterned thought again. I'll say good bye for now, though hope that the next post occurs within a narrower time frame than the lapse between this and the last. Good night.

3 Comments:

Blogger Mrs. McKee said...

whoa--I'm glad I still check this thing periodically.

Who are your two dear friends returning to work with you?

Miss ya! Come visit me in AZ.

10:06 AM  
Blogger Liz said...

i can't believe you found the time to write! i'm so proud of you.;)

3:56 PM  
Blogger Dan, Tracy, Gracelyn & Olivia said...

To say we miss you is an absolute understatement. I truly envy the day that we can sit and talk about how life and travels have changed us and yet we are still so much the same, still desiring the company of those we hold dear and share our history with. It's such a pleasure to read your words again, I hope time allows that they return more frequently. Love and all our best wishes are all we can send over the distance but we do. Know you are loved by us!

4:15 AM  

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